I currently feel like I am sprinting, full speed ahead down the back of the mountain that is my Peace Corps Service. I will officially close my Service on November 15, and the new group of Agriculture volunteers arrives in country on September 27. It is terrifying, exhilarating, nauseating, and confusing. I am terrified of the unknown that lurks in America. The changes that have taken place while I spent the last two years bucket bathing and learning how to milk cows seem to be waiting just around the corner. This blog was meant to be my “So you want to join the Peace Corps” blog but it has morphed into something else so here it is:
I would first like to say that, regardless of whether or not
you join the Peace Corps, you should never, ever tell a returned volunteer that
you “thought about joining the Peace Corps”.
Just about everyone in the world considered being a marine biologist and
a vet at some point in their childhood, but do they tell every vet they meet
that they thought about doing it too?
No. This may seem uncaring but I do not care that you considered joining
the Peace Corps. If you don’t do it,
that’s fine just keep it to yourself.
When I began applying to the Peace Corps I had no idea what
to expect. I had been studying Spanish in college and wanted an opportunity to
improve my language. I was also worried
that I would get a job and pick a town and never leave. Where is the fun in that? Where is the adventure? I do not consider
myself to be a very adventurous person but I knew that I wanted to do something
big. There also was some first world
guilt thrown in there. During my study
abroad experience in Argentina I wrote a research paper on a welfare program
and was able to visit and interview different families living with essentially
nothing. The biggest money crisis of my
life had been my mother forcing me to wear a hand-me-down dress to homecoming,
oh the shame! A part of me felt that I did not appreciate everything life had
given me, everything my parents have worked to give me, I felt that Peace Corps
would teach me to be truly thankful.
Did I learn what I set out to learn? Am I a Spanish master
who can return to America and never again feel guilty swiping a credit card and
paying $6 for a coffee? Absolutely not.
My Spanish is now interlaced with random words of Guarani
and typical Paraguayan phrases, such as “un poco” (a little). Instead of asking someone to “come here”, I
now say “come here a little”. I do not
use proper tenses and I make up words or just use my hands to gesture. I am absolutely effective with my community
and received an “advanced high” rating on my language exam but I have lost any
semblance of professionalism that my Spanish once held.
My first world guilt has only risen. I used to be aware that I had it easy, in the
sense that you are aware that it is cold in Alaska. Two years in Paraguay is like going to Alaska,
getting frost bite on your toes and trying to explain the sensation to
others. They nod their head and make the
appropriate “ouch” face but they do not get it.
Unless they get frost bite too, they never will. I find myself listening to friends and family
(sorry guys) complain about their lives and I nod my head and respond in the
appropriate manner but inside I am screaming “IT DOESN’T MATTER”. There are bigger issues in the world, your
wifi speed is absolutely irrelevant.
I know that after a few months back home I will return to
caring about a lot of these things too but Peace Corps has taught me something
invaluable. I now understand some things
just are not important in the grand scheme of things. I do not have a car when I get back, my
neighbor does not have direct access to potable water. She has to rely on the kindness of another
neighbor, who lives a half mile away, to share their well water. Not only does she have to walk multiple times
a day to get water but she also has to worry about maintaining the friendship
in order to provide her family with drinking water. I think I can live without a car.
This is what Peace Corps has done for me. It is liberating. I often find myself stressing out about what
awaits me in America and then I stop. I have a place to stay and access to food
and water. I am not naïve in thinking
that I am now above having petty problems or that I will live an altruistic
life, free of selfish indulgences. I am
fully aware that I will return to America and binge on food and culture until
my brain and stomach hurt. I am just
thankful that now when I do allow myself to be bogged down by life’s challenges
that I can think back to my little rural Paraguayan town and appreciate how
good I really have it.
As you may have noticed, if you read the introduction, this
blog did not turn out to be my “so you want to join the Peace Corps” blog. I am
not really sure what happened but I’ve gone too far to turn back now and fix
it. Here are some site updates:
- All 8 chicken coops have been built!!!
- 200 chicks, 8 bags of feed, and vaccinations will be delivered on October 1.
- My women’s group is planning on making chipa (cheese bread) to sell and raise money for the group on October 1.
- Na Eugenia’s bees have officially been moved into their new Kenya Top Bar Hives and a new swarm took over my hive that got eaten by a random wild animal! The new swarm looks really strong so hopefully I can bring some honey home!
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| New comb from the new bees! They've only been there for 2 or so weeks! Que Guapas! |
When we were bee keeping the bees seemed to really want to
gather around my crotch. I have no idea
why this happened, and it was a little terrifying. The only answer I can come up with is that
perhaps the queen had flown there and they were gathering around her. I got stung around 8 times and now, 2 days
later, have the itchiest thighs of my life. Bee perks!
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| Doesn't normally happen. |
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| Beekini? |
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| Look how big Todd has gotten! |
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